It saddens me to say this but the story behind the video I posted previously was a fraud.  The guy was not dying from cancer as he claimed and he even had members of his own family fooled.  However, the lyrics of his song about God being our healer and him being more than enough for us are one hundred percent true.  I’ve heard that the guy who wrote this song and deceived many is now seeking mental help and i hope that he finds the help that he needs and I sincerely hope that people will forgive this man.  I know that we all sin and need forgiveness and even though this guy screwed up in a very public and humiliating way and hurt a lot of people he is still not too far out reach for God’s mercy and forgiveness.

At the beginning of August I will get to move into my new apartment.  I will be living in a spacious 2 bedroom-2 bath place at the links apartments.  This is a major upgrade from the old crap house that i moved out of a couple months ago, so yea for no more mice, roaches, or ridicuously high gas and electric bills.  A lot is going on in life right now with work and church especially with the new greater little rock campus about to open.  But I’m loving it.

At the present time (at least for a few days) I am living alone in my friends’ two bedroom apartment.  My friends (the Paladino’s) are gone to Chicago this summer and I have been subleasing their place while they are gone.  Austin will move in from the 24/7 house in the next few days, but for the last 6 days and probably for the next day or two I am living solo.  It’s kinda nice I’ll admit being able to truly be alone with my thoughts without the distractions of other people in the same living quarters.  Yet at the same time it can get to the point where things are just too quiet.  Over the past few days there have been times I have wanted to scream, cus, and cry.  And at other times I have been happy and wanted to love more, give more and learn more.  My wounded soul aches and yearns and weeps over the uncertainty of this present life, but likewise rejoices in the continuing hope found in my savior, redeemer, and healer.  In the past, I would bury my head in the sand and hope while crossing my fingers that one day I would wake up and everything would just click.  And when everything clicked, i could just smooth sail through a problem free life without problems and turn into some kind of “Super” christian complete with the blue suit, red cape and s across my chest.  Well that day never came and I’ve come to grips with the fact that it never will.  What I am really coming to grips with is that I am weak, I am vulnerable, I am helpless, I am sinful, I am fearful, I will hurt you, I will let you down.  Yet, HIS strength is made perfect in my weakness and the truth of who I am in HIM is far greater than who I am on my own.  Is it easy to keep this mindset, especially when I know myself better than anyone and know the depths of my humanity?  No I would say that I don’t deserve a love like this, I would say that God would never want to use someone such as me.  I would say that he must have the wrong guy and that it would be best to leave me alone.  But he hasn’t left me alone, he has kept on loving me, kept on drawing me in, kept on rebuilding me from the ashes.  A love like this is incomprehendible, something that I will never be able to fully wrap my head around.  But I accept it and I pray that I will realize through every weakness, charecter flaw, or insecurity that HIS strength is indeed being made perfect in the midst of my chaos.

So tomorrow night I am celebrating my 24th birthday (my actual birthday is on sunday).  A group of friends and I are eating at PF Chang’s restaraunt in Little Rock and then going to see the new chronicles of Narnia movie.  So life is going pretty well at the moment.  I’ve been working and I interview tomorrow for a new position at my office at 9AM.  I am loving helping out at Real Life, the students are a blast (never a dull moment there).  Well i know this is kinda short, but i don’t really know what else to say and i won’t waste anyone’s time (if anyone even reads this) with my random ramblings.  Later peeps.

So I’m at work and kinda bored.  No big deal, just nothing exciting going on around here.  Well, tonight is American Idol night and for the 2nd week in a row i’m having people over to watch and I’m glad that kristy has finally been eliminated.  I hope the 2 David’s have awesome performances tonight.   I’m trying to diet right now and it sucks, but since i have ballooned like a bloated pig over the past few months i find it absolutely neccessary.  But other than my weight issues, I’m happy with my life right now and the new doors that God has opened up in the past few months.  I know that this post has been random, but random is what i am, so here ya go.  Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease

In previous years, I rarely watched American Idol (other than the really bad auditions).  But this year, I have become part of the faithful millions who watch the show every week.   So tonight I am having people over to watch the show and see what happens when the top 7 perform Mariah Carey songs.  Here is my ranking/take on the current contestants.

7.  Kristy Lee Cook- I can’t believe she is still on the show. She’s attractive I give her that but she is not enertaining and I don’t think she can sing that well.  But she will probably end up selling a lot of country records.

6. Carly Smithson- I think she has a good voice, but she kinda creeps me out. 

5. Syesha Mercado-She has an awesome vocal range, but she needs to stay away from Whitney Houston songs.

4. Brooke White-She’s beautiful and seems so kind, caring, humble.  Definitely has an Indy sound.  Too bad she’s married.

3. Jason Castro-I love his mellow sound.  I could imagine myself listening to his cd while driving around trying to clear my head.  He’s also very humble and seems like he would be a genuinely nice guy.

2. David Cook- This guy rocks.  I would love to go to one of his concerts cause he puts so much energy and originality into all his songs.  Whether he wins Idol or not he’s already a star.

1. David Archuleta- No i’m not a crazed teenage girl, but this guy has some freakin pipes especially for his age.  Although him not being able to finish a sentence without the nervous laughter gets annoying, he is very humble and inspiring.  It would appear that he has a connection with every note he sings.  Although, he will probably in the future take up a lot of air play time on radio disney, he is still extremely talented.

Hey guys I finally decided to make one of these pages.  I mean after all, I used to post on xanga all the time and this is a way better layout.  So yeah i’m tired and about to go to bed, but I promise to let you inside my often times random mind and hopefully keep you enertained.

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